Absurd Alex Rider Role Play
by White.Black.Truth.Lies
Summary: People being blown up, out of control pokeage and hotdogs... Why wouldn't you want to click onto this role play and read it... And then review it? The only way you'll find out is if you click on it... So go on. I, Lies, and my dear friend Boat dare you ;D


_A/N: This is a role play written by Lies (white-black-truth-lies) and Boat (upside-down-boat). Please review and enjoy! ^.^_

**Disclaimer: Don't own Alex Rider, or Inuyasha, etc. Boat and Lies are not fictional however, and DO exist!! :D**

_Lies: Italics._

Boat: Normal.

-

_Lies: -strokes imaginary beard- hmmm… oh my god it's a flying… pencil?_

Boat: -looks around- Dumbo. It's only Alex!

Alex: -flies in on parachute- Hello?

_Lies: How in the world did I think a boy falling from space on a parachute was a flying pencil? _

_Alex: -shrugs- the same way Boat thought you were an alien and tried to stake you through the heart even though everyone knows that's how you kill a vampire, if you want to kill an alien you have to do this! –pulls out a super gigantic washing basket- fold it alien._

_Lies-covering her eyes dramatically- oh my god folding washing! I'm feeling weak… oh my god I'm melting…!_

Boat: Melting from what? Air? The washing isn't even touching you. –sighs in frustration- Stop that Alex!

Alex: -holding out an item of washing menacingly- Sorry… -puts washing out of sight-

**Hysterical laughing~**

_Alex and boat turn to find Lies rolling around on the ground clutching her stomach as she fought back tears._

_-Simultaneously Boat and Alex ask- what?_

_Lies: I can't- can't- believe- you-you fell for it!! _

_Alex and Boat: huh?_

_Lies: -sits up- you didn't actually think I was an alien did you? –lies stares at them- oh my god you did!-continues to crack up on the ground._

_Boat and Alex: -shuffle awkwardly._

Inuyasha: Who the hell are all these people?

Boat: Hi Inuyasha! :D

Alex: (hesitant) Why does he have dog ears?

Lies: Oh, don't worry. He's perfectly fine. –smiles-

Alex: (sarcastic) Coming from the person who convinced me she was an alien? I don't think I should believe you…

Inuyasha: -points dramatically at Boat- You were the one who defeated Naraku! ((Reference to Boat's Inuyasha role play. Don't worry about it…))

Boat: Pfft. That was nothing… glad you remember me though! –beams-

Alex: (to Lies) What are they talking about?

Lies: -waves a hand dismissively- Don't worry about it. You haven't seen the anime, so you wouldn't know…

(Inuyasha and Boat continue talking)

Alex: (getting more weirded out by the second) I think I have to go now…

Boat: Why!?

Inuyasha: -blinks- Who's he?

Lies: But you can't go Alex! D:

Alex: Actually, I do. MI6 want me to complete another mission, and I have to rescue a little boy…

Lies: Is his name Cameron?? –stares wide eyed-

Boat and Inuyasha: Huh?

Alex: Yes… how did you know that??

Lies: Never you mind… just go now, okay? –waves goodbye to Alex-

Inuyasha: Why am I even here!?

_Lies: I don't know, it's not like we want you here is it Boat?_

_Boat: -looks up- huh?_

_Lies: -sighs- You're such a fangirl._

_Boat: Am not!_

_Lies: Are too!_

_Boat: Am not!_

_Lies: Are too!-mysteriously disappears-_

_Boat:-stares at empty space- where'd she go? Lies? Lies? Oh no! Lies come back!_

**With Lies~**

_Alex: Ahhh!!! What are you doing here?_

_Lies: -stares around the room- I felt like teleporting myself here so I did._

_Lies: -walks up to Jason's' dead body and pokes it- I really killed him didn't I?_

_Alex: (looking weirded out) No… you didn't, Wolf did. –watches as Lies pokes Jason faster and faster until her finger is a blur- stop that!_

_Lies: -stops and looks up- uh…no. –goes back to poking Jason's eye-_

_Wolf: Cub…?_

_Alex: don't worry Wolf, she's harmless….-Jason's eye falls out the socket- I think…_

Boat: -magically appears right next to Alex-

Alex: -jumps in fright- Ah!

Boat: -scratches chin- That was a bit OOC for you Alex. Are you feeling okay? –pokes Alex-

Lies: -poking Jason still-

Wolf: Will everybody stop poking everything!

Boat: -stops poking and kicks Lies- Fine. –pouts- You're no fun…

-Back to where Boat and Lies disappeared from-

Inuyasha: Where the hell did everyone go?? –looks around and catches scent- Oh well… -shrugs and runs off after scent-

Boat: What are you doing here? Weren't you supposed to be gone, stranded, left behind by us?

Lies: Uh, I think he understood your FIRST definition, Boat.

Inuyasha: That's what I could smell!! –runs over to random, nearby hotdog stand and begins consuming hotdogs-

Wolf and Alex: -stare at Inuyasha in awe and disgust-

Boat: Hey Inuyasha, you might want to NOT eat all those…

Inuyasha: Keh. –stands and looks around- Have you seen Kagome?

Lies: Why would WE have seen her? We've been HERE.

Boat: She went in a general that direction. –points in random direction-

Inuyasha: -runs off without a word and unsuspecting of Boat's lie-

Alex: So… -kicks Jason's body and it doesn't do anything-

Lies: -rolls eyes- Well, of course it doesn't do anything…!

_Creepy scratchy voice: You will pay for killing me!_

_Lies: oh please –cracks fingers and neck then leans down and draws a zip over Jason's' mouth-_

_Alex: Oh my god… how did you do that?_

_Boat: She has magical zipper abilities._

_Wolf: Cool._

_Cameron: Hi Alex!_

**Everyone looks at adorable little, suddenly appearing, boy~**

_Alex: I haven't rescued you yet._

_Snake appearing beside Cameron: well you've been standing here for so long I decided to quit waiting and unlocked the door with the key I had had right from the beginning._

_Alex: (turning red) With. The. Key._

_Lies: He's going to blow!!!_

_Alex: -blows up-_

_Wolf: Great. Now I'll get binned for letting him die._

_Alex's voice: No you won't, I'm right behind you._

_Lies: -jumps- Jeez! Don't do that!_

_Alex shrugs: I promise I'll do that again._

_Lies: I said don't!_

_Alex: I promise I won't not do that again._

_Lies: -sighs- Do that again._

_Alex: I won't do that again. Damn, tricked by reverse psychology! _

_Lies: -grins smugly-_

Boat: Notice how I got left out of most of that? –sighs- Only thinking about themselves…

Wolf: But I was thinking about you.

Boat: -frowns as she sees a double meaning to Wolf's words- No. Not like that. Go away. –pokes Wolf-

Wolf: I thought I told you to stop poking everything! :O

Boat: Correction. You told Lies and I to stop poking everything. And, you're not an everything, therefore I can poke you! :D –poking Wolf-

_Wolf: -Sweat drop- _

_Cameron: -Giggles- You're funny! –Pokes Boat-_

_Lies: Awwww!!!!!_

_Snake: Has anyone, anyone at all, noticed that Jason's dead body is holding a bomb that's going to go off in two point seven-one seconds?_

_Everyone: -Looks- No!!!_

**BOOM!!!**

**Everyone dies~**

Boat: (to Lies) Well, that was a close one! –grins-

Lies: You idiot! You've killed Alex, Snake and Wolf!

Boat: Tsk, tsk. Lies, I have not killed them. One, they are fictional characters-

Lies: -interrupts- But they're awesome fictional characters!

Boat: (ignoring Lies) And two, they still exist outside this role play. JEEZ.

Lies: Oh. They're still awesome fictional characters, and you killed them! –runs away-

Boat: (to herself) How could I kill them when I didn't know about the bomb? –sighs- Oh well. Lies will be Lies… -disappears-

Inuyasha: -from where ever he is- Review people! –eats another hotdog-

_A/N: Well I hope we didn't traumatise __**too**__ many people… -sigh- if you haven't run away from the sheer absurdness that is this role play we as in, me and Boat, would really, really, really like you to review! –glares threateningly- :P_


End file.
